2019/12/30 - travel
When the year started, I had a 1 month old baby. We spent New Years at home, maybe someone visited that night. I don't always remember things I wish I could remember.
I thought that 2019 would be a year of recovery, but I'm afraid my condition has only gotten worse. Today, Uber decided to automatically charge me for RidePass their monthly service. I don't remember signing up for it, and I paid for every ride, so I don't know how this "service" is supposed to benefit people. They weren't clear that it is tied to a specific city, or a specific type of ride. I don't know anything about it, so how could I have agreed to it? I am pretty certain the CFPB was created so the mafia can hunt down all the "rats" willing to report bad business practices and make their life a living hell. I can't prove this is true; yet. I haven't adjusted well to the Trump presidency. The tech support at my bank tells me it's my fault people steal from me because I'm poor and stupid.
I learned a new architecture, a game engine called Quake 3 from 1998. This project was fun because I was able to prove to myself that I do, in-fact, enjoy other people's aged code. When the year started, I was barely using the computer and I would say I definitely DO NOT want to read other people's code. My previous boss definitely did not want to read my code and now he works for GoDaddy, the first place I applied to (and got rejected from) when I got out of school. I am glad to be someone else's step-stool.
I think I fell in love with my wife more. I feel like I am more attracted to her than ever before. The way she healed from the pregnancy, the way she cares for our baby, the way she acts so incredibly ambitious and motivated. She inspires me to be a better person every day, maybe even more like her. She is fashionable and graceful. Her sense of humor is pointed and honest, and nearly gives me chills when she makes me laugh. My parents separated when I was a baby, so I was undoubtedly nervous about starting a family. I was even more scared that I wouldn't like being a parent after he was born. This couldn't be further from the truth. I love my family with all my heart. Family is the only thing in my life that makes any sense. I wish I could serve them better, but I can barely serve myself.